10) 8 Simple Rules for Living in my Shitty Apartment

Here's a deleted scene from "Lemme ask you this, Do you believe Jesus is the son of God?"

When Russ paid for his two months rent he was informed of the short list of rules he needed to follow if he wanted to live in the apartment.

The first rule of living with The Actor...
-Don't advertise that you are living with The Actor

Whoops... Russ broke that rule before even moving in.  After getting off the phone with The Actor Russ sent out a mass text informing people he may be living with T.K. from "The Parent'Hood."

-Don't drink, smoke, or curse in the apartment.

If The Actor only knew what was actually going on in the apartment.  Russ was pretty sure a couple of his room mates were shooting up something in the bathroom throughout the day/night.

-Take your shoes off in the apartment.

"See how these parts of the carpet by your bed are pretty clean?"
The carpet's "pretty" dirty.  The Actor said he's rent a Rug Doctor sometime and clean the carpet.  He doesn't want us tracking in dirt... (I might actually have to take a picture of the carpet he doesn't want us dirtying up... it's filthy.)

-Don't sleep nude, or in your underwear.

The apartment is soooo fucking hot.  Russ could either lay in shorts and a shirt on top of his sleeping bag, or... break the rules, just wear boxers and a shirt, and sleep inside his sleeping bag.  Either way he sweats his balls off.  It's lose lose.  One night Russ even tried sleeping in his car it was so hot.

-After taking a shower, don't come out of the bathroom nude, or in your underwear.

Russ thought this was a pretty obvious rule.  There wasn't anything he wanted to show the four other guys, the lesbian, or the four kids in the apartment.

-Don't sit in or use The Actor's office space.

Fine.  You don't have internet on that computer anyways.

-Don't go in The Actor's room.

Fine.  I bet it's hot as fuck in there anyways.

-Clean up after yourself.

Fuck you.